YOU IDIOT!!! (Pointing to self...)

And to everyone I've called an IDIOT, I hope you know it's not meant and is only in the spirit of this silly discussion... :)
 
First big road trip on my xs750 that used/lost oil. Near Seattle a cage pulls up beside me and points down. I look down to see well oiled boot and pant leg. The IDIOT who checked the oil at the last stop left the cover/dip stick off and oil is slinging out of the opening. While replacing the oil on the roadside, a passing semi blew the bike off the side stand onto the guardrail, breaking the shield and cracking the fairing. The Tacoma Yamaha shop had the dip stick and fresh shield to put me back on the road.
 
These things happen to all motorcycle riders. The ones who say it hasn't happened to them, is lying.
 
I tell non-riders that riding a bike (particularly a big one) is a lot more like flying an airplane than driving a car. It is a challenging mix of meticulous preparation, mental alertness, technical knowhow, physical skill, strength & agility....and a bit of luck - in what must be agreed is a pretty unforgiving environment.

If everything goes well, it looks easy, it's a ton of fun and the rider looks like a superman-hero - BUT - if something goes wrong, the stuff can pile up in a most unattractive way, very quickly. That's all fine if you're still "on the runway" or in the garage - but if it happens in the air / on the road, the consequences can be dire.
 
About 2 weeks ago, I changed my oil for the 22nd time. It almost never goes flawlessly, but this time it went pretty smooth. I hadn't knocked the oil pan over, no oil ran on body work or centerstand, end of funnel didn't come out of fill hole and dribble oil all over motor. I was amazed.

Cleaned everything up, fired it up to warm up, took old oil out and drained it into used oil can, came back in to shut bike off and check oil level only to discover I had left oil fill cap off. Spots of oil all over the garage. Want to know how far the oil spray will travel out of an open fill hole when running? 12 feet (I measured) . Want to know what was TEN FEET from the ST? My CB 1100. arrgghhh. Got to wash the CB that day too! and I had to open another qt of oil because the oil level dropped to the low line in the window.
 
I can't reply but I must. Have not done any of these things. But am I cursed because because I am posting this?
 
I can't reply but I must. Have not done any of these things. But am I cursed because because I am posting this?

Absolutely NOT! Take pride in your ability to avoid the brain farts some of us suffer from!

But I'm not sure I believe you... :)
 
About 2 weeks ago, I changed my oil for the 22nd time. It almost never goes flawlessly, but this time it went pretty smooth. I hadn't knocked the oil pan over, no oil ran on body work or centerstand, end of funnel didn't come out of fill hole and dribble oil all over motor. I was amazed.

Cleaned everything up, fired it up to warm up, took old oil out and drained it into used oil can, came back in to shut bike off and check oil level only to discover I had left oil fill cap off. Spots of oil all over the garage. Want to know how far the oil spray will travel out of an open fill hole when running? 12 feet (I measured) . Want to know what was TEN FEET from the ST? My CB 1100. arrgghhh. Got to wash the CB that day too! and I had to open another qt of oil because the oil level dropped to the low line in the window.

Awesome! That's what I'm talking about!!

Did something similar with a big spoon in a sink once. Turned on the kitchen sink faucet and walked away only to come back and find that the spoon was perfectly shooting the water back up out of the sink and all over the floor! My brain farts occur on AND off the bike!
 
Absolutely NOT! Take pride in your ability to avoid the brain farts some of us suffer from!

But I'm not sure I believe you... :)

Oh you can believe me. However I have come very very close to doing some of these. I not sure I get her back upright.
 
About 2 weeks ago, I changed my oil for the 22nd time. It almost never goes flawlessly, but this time it went pretty smooth. I hadn't knocked the oil pan over, no oil ran on body work or centerstand, end of funnel didn't come out of fill hole and dribble oil all over motor. I was amazed.

Cleaned everything up, fired it up to warm up, took old oil out and drained it into used oil can, came back in to shut bike off and check oil level only to discover I had left oil fill cap off. Spots of oil all over the garage. Want to know how far the oil spray will travel out of an open fill hole when running? 12 feet (I measured) . Want to know what was TEN FEET from the ST? My CB 1100. arrgghhh. Got to wash the CB that day too! and I had to open another qt of oil because the oil level dropped to the low line in the window.

I know exactly what that must look like. Friend of mine was changing oil on a car but could not get the drain plug off for some reason. So he decided to use the vacuum method through the dip-stick-hole to get the oil out. Unfortunately, instead of creating a vacuum in the oil extractor, he pressurised it. Opened the valve and... BOOM. 5 cars, the 25ft high ceiling , the floor, walls, windows, just about everything covered in oil. Glad I only came in 1hr after the event :)
 
It almost never goes flawlessly, but this time it went pretty smooth

My oil change went very smoothly as well. No spills, no drips, perfect. Then while cleaning up I went to pour off my old oil into one of the Rotella jugs going to the recycle center and realized that I had forgotton to label the jug as "dirty" and I had used old Rotella oil to refill the ST. Very frustrating.
 
I was coaching a MSF class this spring. When I face the students as they do a static demo I reverse my clutch and front brake hands so they don't grab the wrong ones. After my riding demo the other coach says "Darren show them how to properly squeeze the front brake". " again but this time use the brake lever instead of the clutch....... "
 
R & R rear wheel for new tire on my '93 CB750 Nighthawk a few yrs. ago. Something I've done many times, as wife's Nighthawk and all our Z-1's have same rear drum setup. I fail to reconnect the torque link that keeps the brake backing plate stationary. Roll down the driveway, touch the rear brake and promptly wrap the brake pull rod around the rear axle spacer. Have to cut the pull rod with a hacksaw to release the brake & be able to move the bike.

Good Ridin'
slmjim
 
Many years ago I owned a gs 750 the fuel tank had a Twist cap and a lockable cover flap .one day I was filling up in a rush locked the cover and set off but a few miles down the road I started smelling petrol then my crotch started getting wet stopped to find I hadn't put the Twist cap back on and my crotch was soaked in petrol .that got the old heart beat going I can tell you :eek:
 
As a retired Police Motor Officer one good tip to pass along. Get used to mounting and dismounting on the high (right) side. In the event you forget the kick stand or it fails you will not have to worry about injury along with the insult. Happened to me several times due to quick dismounts or having kickstand failure from being parked on the side of the highway.
 
I was in Colonial Williamsburg in a parking spot and the spot was at such an angle that the bike was still almost upright while sitting in the side stand. I had the bright idea to put it on the centre stand. . I realized my error pretty quickly as my bike started leaning away from me. . No way to catch it. Oh, and I had forgotten to close my MCL highway blades, so the one on the right snapped off. . . Luckily the blade and my pride were the only things damaged. A gentleman who saw it all happened helped me to pick it up.

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